Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

Members: 1178
Latest Activity: 7 hours ago

Just a reminder to all of you over these next few days. The weather reports all over are talking extreme heat. Those of you out West have even warmer temperatures than here in the Midwest or East. Please keep well hydrated by drinking plenty of water. Hopefully all of you have air in your homes. If not, please find a friend or relative that has air and see if you can go there. Otherwise, find out where the cooling centers in your neighborhood or town are and use them. Please take care not to over exert yourself and check in here.

Discussion Forum

So Lost and thinking about my anniversary

Started by Terry Kent. Last reply by Elvira Castellanos Apr 16. 14 Replies

Depression or grief?

Started by Theresa Wimann. Last reply by kim cobbs Apr 16. 9 Replies

Why can't I stop the crying?

Started by Elvira Castellanos. Last reply by Jane P. Mar 21. 16 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by Theresa Wimann 7 hours ago
Hi everyone. I may have found part of the answer to why I am forgetting. It turns out the antidepressant I've been on can cause temporary memory problems. It takes 2months to go off it because it messes with your brain seretonin, oh yay! My piano came today. It is horribly out of tune so playing low and high notes are a bit painful but I sat down and played for two hours. For those of you whose dogs are grieving, mine did that too. Now, they are shameless when any male comes in the house. It is a bit embarrassing. Almost like I don't pay attention to them but when it is time for food...:). I also got my antique frame (1780-1840 circa) today. It had been shipped so some of the plaster had loosened. I had to stop and stabilize it until I can finish working on it this weekend. It has clay angels on a pecan frame. I'll need to varnish but will need to re gild the plaster first. I think I go from thing to thing because when I stop I have to think. Too painful still to do too much of that. Have a good evening everyone. I'm going to drink my tea and head to bed.
Comment by Wilela Trip 9 hours ago

Marsha and all others that are interested in the movie "Heaven is for real".   I read the book.  If you read the book,  you'll know the movie - the movie is exactly like the book.  I've seen lots of movies that had a book that precedes  the movie,  I've never seen one most like the book as this one.  It was very pleasant and I'm sure you'll like it if you believe in that kind of thing.

Comment by stacey 10 hours ago

Carol- That our little ones do I would be able to do this without him. So much joy and for just one day I'd like to be in his brain because some of the things that come out of his mouth OMG! To funny!!! I asked him to help me out the other day and he told me not right now. I asked him why he couldn't help me, he said I was playing in the sand box.   I love it, it keeps me going. Glad to see your still going strong also. Keep things positive.

Comment by Carol Kayser 12 hours ago

I just wanted to share that today I stopped at the bank and saw a lady with a sweet Pomeranian dog.  Of course I said hello to the dog and then she gave me a story of her life and I was to myself saying "this poor lady, listen to what she is saying".  Her life was indeed full of trauma and sadness and yet she had her little sweet dog and she felt blessed.  We can all feel grateful for something in our lives, something or someone we can love/help. 


Just a thought for the day.

Comment by Carol Kayser 12 hours ago

Janeo, I hope you had a wonderful Easter even though you moved recently.  I spent a lot of time with family and my granddaughter Abby.  Though I must say I think she went into candy overload on the day of...even she told me (she's 2 1/2) "grandma I had too much candy"...

Well off for a 2 hr dental appt - who thought I could have so much fun! Yikes, not:(

Keep well Janeo.



Comment by Carol Kayser 12 hours ago

Dear Stacey, I really want to see the movie too, and my sister-in-law went and said it was quite wonderful.  I can't wait.

So glad to hear little Damien is doing well - he and my granddaughter are almost the same age and I just adore her little personality, they are very smart and challenging but bring so much joy and laughter into our lives.

You take care and continue to do as well as you are.  Glad you had a nice Easter too.




Comment by Carol Kayser 12 hours ago

Dear Marsha, thanks for your kind words.  I am so glad for you that you are volunteering at the shelter.  That would be quite something if you could get a little kitten.  There are so many animals, in particular cats, that are hoping for rescue.  My Marbles (yes because he has very big eyes) was a rescue.  Animals are so appreciative of being rescued and they can't wait to show their love.  There is a cat shelter where my sister lives called the Happy Cat shelter and they have a great idea of collecting receipts from the local IGA and then I think they take the donated receipts and buy cat food etc.

Also the SPCA just took in I think 5 rescued horses and one is a pregnant mare.  They do good work.

I am sorry for the loss of your Molly too, I hope you will bring home a new life and new beginning:)


Big hugs,


Comment by stacey 19 hours ago

Marsha- I heard of the movie too and I'd love to go see it but I may have to wait until I comes out. I don't know if Damian will sit it yet. I will definitely give him a big hug for you, I'm also glad to see your getting out more its a good thing. Let me know how you liked the movie please.

Comment by Marsha H 23 hours ago

Stacey ... I feel blessed to have had a great Easter.  It was good to be with my small immediate family and then asked out Sunday for another dinner by friends. 

I am so happy that you are finally into a routine and that you and Damien had a good Easter. Your poor little guy was over-tired from all the excitement.

I can certainly understand trying to explain to Damien why his father is not around and it reminded me to tell you of this movie that is called, 'Heaven Is For Real' a true story of a little boy who had a near death experience.  Here is the youtube and you decide if you want to go see it.  I hope you do.  My girlfriend and I are going to see it on Friday night.  I always believed in Near Death Experiences and have researched it a great deal.

I am so pleased you got to see your husband's side of the family.  Unfortunately, my husband's parents passed away in the mid-90's and I do miss them.  So happy you are more into a set routine, but of course I understand you still do have your rough days.

You and all here are always in my prayers.  Give Damien a hug for me.



Comment by Marsha H yesterday

Kristen ...  I can understand that the link I left you gives you little peace of mind as your grief is far too raw yet.  In time you will be stronger.  We've all been where you are. 

It brought tears to my eyes that your Rob's best buddy Bart isn't doing so well.  It's very common and dogs grieve.  My Tootsie who is part BishonxPoodle after 3 years still looks out the window with her chin resting on the window sill looking for Ernie and I get tears in my eyes.  I have my male Booker T who can take her mind off it for awhile, but I don't believe Tootsie will get over the loss of Ernie.  I also found that when I first started to grieve the dogs were very sensitive and I felt badly for them, but had to go through the grieving process and when I had the odd day of peace I would try my hardest to make up for it.  I always walk them and let them get that energy out of them and that helps.  Pets are truly amazing and I admit my dogs have seen me through so much through the grieving process and gave me a reason to get up in the morning.  Ernie and I were never blessed with children so they are my fur-babies. 




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