Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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Latest Activity: yesterday

Just a reminder to all of you over these next few days. The weather reports all over are talking extreme heat. Those of you out West have even warmer temperatures than here in the Midwest or East. Please keep well hydrated by drinking plenty of water. Hopefully all of you have air in your homes. If not, please find a friend or relative that has air and see if you can go there. Otherwise, find out where the cooling centers in your neighborhood or town are and use them. Please take care not to over exert yourself and check in here.

Discussion Forum

Newly Bereaved

Started by Dorothy Facciponte. Last reply by Dorothy Facciponte Jul 16. 23 Replies

Depression or grief?

Started by Theresa Wimann. Last reply by Theresa Wimann Jun 14. 13 Replies

Survivor Guilt?

Started by Vickie. Last reply by Petal Watson May 26. 4 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by Wilela Trip yesterday

Hi Marsha - I've heard this song and it makes me feel like dancing too.  I actually feel happy sometimes!

Comment by Marsha H on Tuesday

Hey everyone, I had to share this one with you and this is why.  I was teary-eyed while driving a few days back feeling sorry for myself and this song came on the radio and I have to say I found myself smiling and singing to it which shocked my sandals right off my feet.  I went home and found it on Youtube and then burned it on disc and I play it when gardening and I'm singing, working faster and jiggling my bootie to it (ugly sight) and lo and behold some people came down my sidewalk and do just what some of these people are doing ...  arms up, some fancy steps and smiling up at me.  NOTE:  Although we are grieving please pay close attention to some of the people in the video; some are alone, a wheel chair, all shapes and sizes of people and even one young woman walking on the beach alone and obviously not all that happy, but he managed to get a smile out of her with this song.  I hope with all my heart this tune sticks in your heads and brings a smile to you every so often.

Much Love


Comment by Carol Kayser on Tuesday
Thanks Jane P that's great as I was thinking how to watch it! Yes I bet it is a teary one.

Comment by Jane P. on Monday

Carol, After Desert Dove spoke so highly of the movie, "The Shadowlands",  I became interested in watching it and I was able to google the title and watch it in its entirety on my computer.  And it is a great movie - grab the tissue box you will need it! Hugs, Jane P.

Comment by Jane P. on Monday

Theresa, Round-up kills cells and every microorganism in the ground not my favorite item.  If using weed killers be careful to just spray what you want killed or it will kill everything that you sprayed. If using weed killer in the lawn make sure the item does not kill grasses read the label.  Try white vinegar it is natural and will not hurt your dogs or the honey bees.  When using any chemical in your garden the area should be completely dry  before walking on or touching the plants in the area.  If your dogs eat grass or leaves on plants do NOT use round-up anywhere they may be they can ingest this product and wet or dry it kills cells. When using any chemical please wear proper protective clothing and rubber disposable gloves.  If you have an extremely invasive weed and round-up is needed  I usually pour a small amount in a disposable cup and dab the weed with a q-tip soaked in round-up touch the weed leaves and it will die.  

Edging a lawn you can use a tool called a nursery spade or a tool just called an edger.  I use the edger and go along my established gardens edge stepping on the edger and then pulling any unwanted grass that has grown in my flower beds.  Hope this helps.  Hugs, Jane P.

Comment by Carol Kayser on Monday
DesertDove, thanks for the info! Funny as I had a dear friend, a pastor, who talked to me about C.S. Lewis and his book on grief. Must research more for sure. He sounds so great as a person, that's quite something about his friend's mom too!

Comment by Carol Kayser on Monday
Theresa, Anthony Hopkins plays C.S. Lewis and Debra Winger his love. I believe the movie was made in 1985. It is on Desert Dove's recommendation, and I need to watch it.
Comment by Theresa Wimann on Sunday
Who was in shadowlands Carol?
Comment by Theresa Wimann on Sunday
Felt out of sorts since I took a fall and went for a massage on Friday. Worked part of Saturday then took a sauna and a hot bath to get out the rest of the pain. Woke up today feeling much better. Have been just doing small things around the house today but it is the little questions that get to me. What is the difference between a weed killer and roundup? How do you edge an area? How long should I keep my dogs out of a sprayed area? I get so frustrated that I don't have all the answers and have to ask. Maybe that is something I'm meant to to ask for help. I've never been good at it. Too independent. Too...proud? Too capable? I don't know. It just takes so much longer....oh, I'm back to self-impatience, another of my flaws...
Comment by DesertDove on July 17, 2014 at 3:58pm

  Carol....  Hi   I'm doing ok  thx for asking  but I know what you mean getting tired  especially with granddaughter, but how nice.   Nice you & Marsha live near each other!  It's been hot here too!   Yes,  I think you will like the movie & the book   I sure did   for everyone who didn't read   the movie is called  "The Shadowlands" w/anthony hopkins  famous professor in England  Oxford & Cambridge   he also wrote many children's books   even though he never had children!!  of course he was one himself!!  LOL!!!  I just admire him so much.. he passed away around 1960  & still has such influence!  Google his name   that's where I learned alot about him   he & his brother were roomates  & he also took care of his buddy's mom  after the War  (his buddy got killed) & he promised him   he would take care of his mother

his buddy's mom actually lived with him in a huge house   hows that for taking good care of her??  


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